Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Don't Show-cha Your Chocha, Now Featuring an Embarrassed Mannequin

Alright ladies and gentlemen, it's Don't Show-cha Your Chocha time! It's a time of deep personal reflection, spirituality, and most importantly, pictures of people who have decided wearing pants, skirts and/or underwear is totally lame.

Let's start with this artful spread (or clench, more accurately), that reader Susanne titled, "Where the Wild Chochas Grow:"

Get the picture?

Wonderful Rory submitted Mariah Carey's not-so-wonderful new album cover:

Considering what the retoucher did to her breasts, I wouldn't be surprised if she was originally wearing pants but they were edited out.

This one cracks me up:

Says Thomas W.: All that pixelation isn't going to save us from her chocha.

Oh look, it's another pretend-dress from our old friends at Forever 21:

Emma says: It would make a great sweater. Not dress. Sweater.

From Julienne:

Seems to me that, even if she's attempting to channel the ghost of Laurence of Arabia, she could bother with the bottom half of her Abayah. Who wants to ride a camel in that state anyway?

From Diana:

She says: It's Asian Taylor Swift chocha-ing around in a children's park with fathers in the background who are most definitely not watching their kids anymore. [Editor's note: Can't wait for the wholesome internet traffic the phrase "Asian Taylor Swift chocha" will bring to my blog. Good god.]

Couture chocha alert:

Says Tavi: At least she's blunt about her embarrassment.

Next we have three British DSYC moments, with commentary, courtesy of Grace:

How much better would it be if it was ENTIRELY floor length, instead of the front being crotch length??

Ahhh, Jordan. I admire how she has tied a piece of floral fabric around her hips to try and add a sense of demurity to her see though net orange trousers. Sadly, she failed.

I have no words. None.

Here's a doozy:

Says Shayla: I guess she doesn't have to worry about anyone seeing anything when she bends over. You can see stuff when she's standing up! I hope she put pants on before she went out the door.

Next two are from lovely reader Jen's American Music Awards chocha report:

What's that noise? Oh I get it... it’s her chocha screaming: “I want to be in the picture too!”

Shakira should put the chocha showing dress down, go make another album and use the money to buy the rest of the missing pieces for the dress!!

Hmm...speak of the devil:

Says Glynnis: Here is Shakira, whose hips do not lie, coming very closing to airing her chocha.

And finally, this ebay chocha moment from Jenni might be one of my favorites ever. This is her story:

It said "Short dress/top". I clicked. And quickly regretted it:

Apparently I wanted to burn my eyes out as I clicked on the back view:

I mean, Sweet Mother of Jesus, when even a MANNEQUIN has to use its hand to maintain its dignity know you're in trouble!

You guys, the mannequin is embarrassed. Are you laughing as hard as I am? I can't even handle how funny that is.

Thanks so much to all the diligent chocha watchers who keep this feature well-stocked and running smoothly week after week! Find a chocha? Send it in:


Cath said...

So so funny!!

Nadia said...

Wow. I'd be embarrassed if I was that mannequin too. "It's a full moon out today...and the sun's shining too."
Whoever dressed that doll was obviously not thinking clearly.
Hilariously disturbing.

Anonymous said...

I thought maybe I would get tired of this segment, I didn't want to imagine it was true but I thought maybe it would happen. It has not, this still makes me giggle/recoil in horror.

jasmine said...

Ahahah these are hilarious, especially the orange mesh tracksuit. Is that a crotch zipper I spy?

maripatfin said...

you are hysterical. that mannequin looks horrified. I just stumbled on your blog yesterday and am obsessed.

I just gave you a shout out on mine.

Gloria said...

Viven los pantelones!

Rory Sullivan said...

Hilarious collection.

"I have no words," was a perfect summation.

Miss 1949 said...

These always crack me up!

My favorite part of your blog, I can be in the worse mood ever, hop on over to daddy likey (best name ever) and all of a sudden full of joy and fashion. ♥ u


Renée T. Habashy said...

HILARIOUS! Great installment in one of my favorite series.

Unknown said...

Is that Urkel on the Asian Taylor Swift's dress? That's a question I didn't think I'd be typing today.

Lisa said...

I thought nothing could top Asian Taylor Swift, but the mannequin!! lol

Parisienne Farmgirl said...

I live for these posts! They make me cry!!!

Jen Hsieh said...

hahaha i laughed so hard at this post! my favorite is definitely the asian taylor swift. what are these women thinking??? :)
fantastic post!

WendyB said...

That Jodie Marsh picture is from back in the day when she was still beautiful and elegant. You should see her now!

Rhandi said...

My favorite part is that the Asian Taylor Swift is wearing a shirt with Urkel on it. Seriously? An Urkel shirt? And is it just me or does Urkel look like he totally just saw her chocha?

Elizabeth B said...

I guess that if I said that the Forever 21 model in the gray dress is Analeigh Tipton from America's Next Top Model a few cycles back, I would be a huge nerd since you can only see the bottom part of her face... right?

Stacey said...

Oh man, that poor mannequin! It is crying out for some pants!

Chocoholic said...

WendyB - I've seen pics of Jodi March lately...I think she still wears that outfit it just covers less

Julia in Vancouver said...

Oh my gosh Winona, how are you so consistently so funny? I adore your ridiculous sense of humour, and it works at so many levels!

Sometimes I think I'm funny, but my humour is not as universal as yours. A few close friends think I am one of the funniest people they know, but most just look at me with a perplexed, screwed up expression on their face when I say things I think are hilarious. Oh yeah, I think I also find myself much more entertaining than most others. I often find myself doubled over in laughter at what comes out of my mouth... sometimes I even say to those around me "did you just hear that? You get it? Come on!!!"
At least I keep myself entertained. sigh.

LOVE LOVE LOVE you blog.

Katie said...

Laughing so hard I can't breath. DSYC is always entertaining, but this installment is particularly hysterical!

The "Where the Wild Things Grow" comment was a great opener, but the post peaked at the model channeling Laurence of Arabia and the Asian Taylor Swift. However, with a closer like the em"bare"essed mannequin this post was a good, better, best.

thnx for the laughs!! mwahhh

Jenni said...

Hooray! My mannequin chocha is finally bared for all the world to see!

Unknown said...

Amazing as ever. And yes, Urkel totally saw her chocha.

(But I kind of want the pixelated one. I promise faithfully to wear it with pants!)

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