Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Don't Show-cha Your Chocha: Volume III

That's right, it's the moment you've all been waiting for: The third installment of Don't Show-cha Your Chocha!

First up, DSYC VIP (how ya doin' on acronyms so far?) Amber, who scouted out numerous celebrities engaging in high-risk, high-hemline behaviors. I have compiled her findings into the lovely Don't Show-cha Your Chocha collage below, which you're welcome to print out, frame, and hang above your mantle:

Kate Moss (the two photos on the left) is especially impressive. I mean, think of where you normally wear your belt. Now think of chopping off all fabric below said belt, and going about your daily life naked from the waist down. I salute her courage.

Says eagle-eyed reader Laura: I was browsing Active Endeavors, lookin' for a new summer dress to take on vacation, and there is chocha APLENTY, let me tell you. The worst offender:

God she looks uncomfortable. But I guess I would too if I was forced to employ some serious arm strength to hold the hem of my dress below my chocha while my photo was being taken for display on a hugely popular shopping website.

From Nordstrom:

Says Claire: Ah yes, the artfully placed hand technique. Quite a popular one, or so I've heard.

I've often employed this technique when sitting down in a mini skirt, but when you have to use it in the standing position, you've got a problem.

Maya found these photos, in which the model is totally owning both high-risk ensembles, don't you think?

I think she deserves a standing ovation (standing, of course, to respect the fact that she can't sit down).

One of the old standbys for DSYC, American Apparel presents us with hurts to say it...."dress:"

Says Tamara, who claims she's not good at being funny but is totally lying: This is probably one of the best examples I've seen. She's got the crossing-the-legs tactic, the casually-covering-the-crotch-region technique, and the "don't fuck with me, I'm concentrating" look all at once. All I have to say is props, mad props (for not.. y'know, showing it).

Couldn't have said it better myself.

And finally, I got an email from reader Bernie with the title, "Showcha!!! EXTREME!" and, well, homegirl wasn't lying:

Yeah, I don't think a comment from me is really needed here.
Picture via Go Fug Yourself.

If you don't see your DSYC submission yet, don't worry, your hard work has not been forsaken. I'm posting them in the order I receive them, and if the wait seems excruciating, it's only because I'm following the first rule of blogging and dating: Always leave them wanting more.

Speaking of which, I'm always wanting more Don't Show-cha Your Chocha submissions! Stay vigilant, and email your finds to


laila said...

heh ... I almost bought that American Apparel dress once, mostly because it reminded me of Anybodys from West Side Story. ended up opting for the tube dress instead.

The Narcist said...

DSYC VIP=Visual Hilarity!

Marzipan said...

Ick. Je no likey pas aussi.

Emma said...

Sweet Gott in Himmel (I don't know what that means but I hope it's not some sort of Nazi salute), that blue American Apparel dress is HORRIFYING TO THE RETINAS. And the corneas, and all the eye parts in general.

Jamie said...

Wow, that is obscene stuff! The American Apparel "dress" is really just a tank top.

Anonymous said...

Ha! The first model in the top picture is totally missing the bottoms from her pyjamas!

ashley churchill said...

more women need to see this shit.

Anonymous said...

the american apparel ones so funny. it doesn't even look casual anymore, like "oh my hand here just happens to be covering my vaginal area for no reason, not because my cooch is SHOWING or anything"
like shes really twisting herself around to keep her bits in. that dress makes her work for it

the muse said...

i actually have the american apparel "dress" (same color) and tried it on thinking it was a shirt! it comes to about mid thigh on me and i guess it technically could be a dress but i def wear it with tights or jeans!

apb1172 said...

I'm not sure if you place celebs in this catagorey, but I was mildly surprised that this one didn't end up in your latest DSYC! Please forgive me if this was already posted. I got the pic off of TMZ.

Jessica McWilliams said...

I just realized that I actually own that American Apparel t-shirt "dress", in the exact colour shown here. I prefer mine with pants, or at least leggings. No show-cha here.

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