Tuesday, October 17, 2006

It's time to call out Victoria's Secret.


I have a rather large chest--large enough that my sports bras need to be designed by MIT engineers to really do the job, large enough that (looking on the bright side) my stomach looks fairly small by comparison, large enough that if I were a pirate, my shipmates would call me Boobs Madrid.

I wear a 34DD, so I'm not quite into the bras so big that you can wear them as hats (as my friend Caitlin and I used to do to annoy her mom and older sister when we all went bra shopping) territory, but did you know that double D, in the bra world, is technically an E, and gosh I really don't want to talk about it.

I am a girl who just always needs a bra. Victoria's Secret sells a lot of bras. You could say they specialize in bras. They even put their bras in futuristic commercials and claim that they are the most scientifically advanced products ever created (I've gotta side with that Japanese machine that translates dog barks to English, but that's just me). It seems then, that Victoria's Secret and I would have a great, mutually beneficial relationship. I need bras. They sell bras.

But no.

You see, Victoria's Secret abides by a Separate But Equal bra stocking policy that pains me to no end. They display all their most gorgeous bras in B and C cups (my readers have informed me that A cups face the same discrimination) on those fabulous little pink satin hangers. Every time I go in there, I look through every single one of these hangers, and, of course, never find anything close to my size. So I ask a sales associate, and this happens:

"Hi. I'm looking for the Ipex NASA Double-Tech Mercury bra but I don't see one in my size."
"Okay, what size are you?"
"34 DD."
"Oh. Oh my..."
"What??"
"It's just that, well, we keep bras of that size in...the drawers."

This happens every time. The sales girl then leads me over to the gorgeous satin hanger display, crouches down below it into the dusty, cobwebbed Victoria's Secret catacombs, opens one of the drawers and hands me my desired brassiere, careful not to handle it for too long lest she catch whatever mutated me into the big-boobed freakshow that I am.

Let me tell you, by this time, even if the bra could translate canine sounds to simple English, I wouldn't be interested.

27 comments:

Honeybee said...

Spot on, once more. And they do it with the small sizes, too. I'm an A and I have been disappointed many times because the beautiful bra on display (B) was some sad looking little thing without underwiring in the A size. The thing is: the lingerie industry wants you to be a 75B. If you're not, you don't have any rights.

BusyMamma said...

i know that when a friend and I used to go bra shopping, she always thought that those fancy stores didn't carry her size (DD) because they never had them displayed. She/We never bothered asking a sales girl, we just assumed they didn't exist and went to the department stores.

Anonymous said...

Which is why many big-boobied girls have abandoned Vicky's for the welcoming arms of specialty shops, or the even more welcoming arms of Bravissimo.com and Figleaves.com.

I *wish* I was a 34DD; I used to be a DD cup, back in the day (if we define "the day" as "when I was 17 and running cross-country"). I'm a 32HH, and that is pure freakin' misery anywhere but online shopping.

Anonymous said...

I worked at Victoria's Secret for 6 months while in college. Yes, I know, I'm going to hell but I needed that green stuff in order to avoid living in the park so...
Anyways, their policy was to only put Bs & Cs on the racks b/c it looked more 'uniform.' Anything in any other size was put in the catacom...er, drawers. As a sometimes D, depending on my weight, that always bugged me, too. But since, as an employee, I got lingerie for free, I didn't complain.
On a side, note, anything beyond a double D, they don't carry. That's for what Victoria's Secret considers the truly freakish. We had to refer those folks to Macy's or Lane Bryant for their undergarments, which made me *really* feel like I'd sold my soul to Giselle Bundchen.

Nicky said...

ugh, I feel the same way since I'm a DD too. So you're not alone! I usually but Wacoal bras b/c they are so comfy and cute for us girls with more up front. I'm trying to get preggers though so I just pray they don't grow or I don't know what I'll do! haha.

Ally. said...

rofl boobs madrid?!
aw, poor you! i con't say i really have the same problem.. i guess i'm lucky, but atleast your not a J cup, that would be really sad...

Carissa Duhamel said...

As a very average B cup, I have nothing but envy for you my dear.

Anonymous said...

I have that trouble sometimes - and I'm a standard D...

Style Editor said...

girl, I'm with you -- Victoria's Secret just ain't working for me. Besides almost everything in there is padded and seriously! seriously, didn't need that.

le fashion said...

hi, i didn't take the models pics, but i love their outfits! nice blog:)

Anonymous said...

They always do that at our nice Lingerie store (La Senza). I used to think they didn't have DD. I now know they do, but wouldn't buy them there anyways because of this policy. Anyways, even though they make them IN that size, they don't really seem to make them FOR that size, KWIM?? More fabric, but none of the support I need.

P.S. Since having a baby (over 3 years ago, not breast fed for 1 year)I am and remain a DDD!!

Anonymous said...

okay i'm starting to think that i'm the one who's a freak here. i'm an A if i'm lucky! victoria's As are usually too big. and they're almost always padded. because, right, i mean who on earth would want boobs that don't look huge!? well anyway, i've heard rumors that they make an AA for the freaks like me, but i've never found then...even in the drawers.
and i sidenote: über-expenseive european brands like la perla make a-cups that fit me. but saks only carries a B and above, because as the sales lady once told me "the european As are just far too small!" cool, thanks. bitch.

Lauren Messiah said...

I feel your pain. I am a 34D and they never have D's out. NEVER

Margarite Elaine said...

This post is LONG OVERDUE! Vicky's has been hat'n on us big busted women for too long! Then when they finally do make a bra in our size...it offers no support! You would think that would want our money but they've made it painful obvious that they can't be bothered. That's fine with me...the ladies in the Nordstrom and Bloomingdales lingerine dept are nicer anyway :).

Eli said...

for a country obsessed with big boobies, it makes no sense. Im starting to not like Vics. S. either. Instead I go to the Calvin Klein outlet and buy my intimates there.

Anonymous said...

I agree...VS fits a certain body type. Even their A cups are not well fitted to petite frames (i.e. the straps keep falling down). I've switched to Wacoal, have been much happier, and I say, good riddance!

Unknown said...

You know...
i never ever shop at Victoria's anymore for the same reason (im a 32DDD)

Fredricks of Hollywood is the way to go. Yeah, they have the trashy title, but its totally worth it. They know what thier talking about and, if you dig, you can find rediculously cute things

=] here to help
B

alm said...

I know this was seventeen million years ago but I am so compelled to join this debate. I used to be an A, now a bit between B and C. I used to love Victoria's Secret bras, as they came in all sorts of fancy colors and designs and such. But, they suck. I've since switched to the dreadfully expensive department store brands, which almost always do more for the breasts. Yeah, not as "cheap thrills", and I still pop into Victoria's Secret for some frippery (of the not-to-be-worn-out variety), but overall, other places have nicer staff and better bras.

Peajai said...

I won't go on record saying what size bra I wear (lest I be rounded up and forced to join the circus) but I will say that if it weren't for the shoes, body splashes and lip glosses (the old formula, not the new one)... Vicky Secret would've never seen a dime of my money.

I am still working up the nerve to go to one of those specialty bra shops and have a sexy lacy pretty bra custom made for me. That would be a dream!

Anonymous said...

I'm totally with Millie, i'm an AA, and i have NEVER seen one in their store. the sales ladies always told me to just try the A but they're too big, and EVERYTHING has padding. the only comfy small bras you can get are in the pink section, and they're sporty and too adolescent looking

Anonymous said...

i heard somewhere that vs bras were engineered for fakies. yep. well, i wear a similar size to you, and when i do find a vs bra... it still doesn't fit right.

Anonymous said...

For a while, VS bras in two particular styles were the only ones I wore, when I could find them. Mostly I ordered online. I mean, when you're in eighth grade and a 34DD, you don't want to spend much time worrying about your freakish chest, you just pick the easiest thing to find.

A few years later, I bought an actual bra, and found out my real size. Maybe I was a 34DD once, but my real cup measurement is a 32J. I have only found this size online, at places like Bravissimo and figleaves, and only after much trial and error and sending back of purchases.

I am never going to purchase bras from VS again. Even if I get that reduction I've been considering (unlikely) I won't go back. They just don't fit!

Dotchki

Bec said...

Hey I just came across this post and thought I would let you know that I sympathise completely.
I am an Australian 10G (American 8G English 32G) and Australian brands don't make above a D cups so I can only buy imported bras (read expensive)
To top it off I'm now pregnant and really looking forward to trying to find a bra once my breasts fill with milk.

Unknown said...

i'm totally with you. I'm the same size and i have entirely given up on VS. When i have found my size in the past, I try it on only to find out that they want my boobs to spill into the armpits. can't we keep them out front where they belong please?! i've gotten in fights in their dressing rooms with straps and padding... padding in DD bras! I even asked for something to minimize once and they laughed at me. What?! Make them smaller?! Crazy concept, i know. Anyway, I thought I'd share with you the only bra I buy. It fits, it's not all lacy, and it's not grandma like. It's totally worth the $70.
Le Mystere, Tisha bra from Nordstrom.

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2815323/0~2376776~2374327~6010810~6010832?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6010832&P=1

glad i'm not the only one boycotting VS.

Anonymous said...

does anyone else believe that VS labels their bras as bigger cup sizes than other manufacturers? I can wera a 36C almost anywhere but VS.

Anonymous said...

I used to work at VS when I was a freshman in college, and to be honest, I haven't had any problems with their bras. Although, I'm not as big as most of you, or as small as others, they fit perfectly for me. However, I try to stay away from the Pink collection when it comes to their bras. For the smaller breasted ladies out there, I would suggest the intimissimi collection from there. If my memory serves me correctly, they make them as small as aaa, but I could be wrong. They have cute bras and are reasonably priced.

Diane said...

I've given up all hopes of ever even managing to buy a bra at VS. I'm a 34G, a size that doesn't even *exist* to most bra manufacturers. In their minds, if you're big enough to need a G cup, there's no way you could have a smallish frame or a narrow ribcage.

If you live near the Canadian border, I cannot suggest a chain called "Change" enough. There are a few locations in big cities here in Canada, their standard sizes are from 30A to 44G or H in most cases. It's amazing.

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