Sunday, April 11, 2010

Awesome Affordable Etsy Find of the Week: Arch Nemesis Edition


I recently acquired an arch nemesis. It's a pretty low key thing so far. Mostly we send each other ominous text messages and say, "We meet again" whenever we, well, meet again.

If I wanted to step things up though, I can think of a lot of uses for this book (which is actually a guide to known poisons and remedies, rather than the How To Poison People guide that the title implies). Here are a few of my ideas:

1. Set it on the coffee table and invite Arch Nemesis over for tea. Be sure to mark pages and write things like "Good option. Minimal foaming."

2. Run into Arch Nemesis on the street. Say "We meet again" (duh). Let book fall out of purse. Look at book, then look at Arch Nemesis. Say, "Oops."

3. Send book to Arch Nemesis's house with a note that says, "You might want to look up the antidote on page 43. Like, now."

That's all for now. I've gotta get to work on perfecting my menacing cackle.

17 comments:

caffeinerd said...

Hahahaha. This post truly made me laugh out loud. Hope your menacing cackle has been perfected.

Liv said...

I love this blog.
And now I have yet another item on my To-Do list: "Acquire arch-nemesis."
It's right below "Purchase feeble public-access show and exploit it."

http://idlefascination.blogspot.com/

Giancarlo said...

You should also sit across the table from each and say "we're not so different, you and I."

N. said...

The book on Etsy sold but check half.com...

J.Rose said...

haha this is hilarious! and arch nemesis aside, i would do #2 for random strangers and #1 for people i don't know well who are at my house :)

Happy Lisa said...

Bahahahaha
I definitely need to get an arch-nemesis

WendyB said...

That book would go well with one of my poison rings.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant!

Lovers, Saints and Sailors said...

Remind me never to get on your bad side.

Actually, I think being on your bad side would be pretty fun.

Maybe I can be on both?

Vanessa said...

You're hilarious, Winona, but I know you've heard that a ZILLION times.

Anonymous said...

Argh! Foiled again! You may have made a mockery of our enmities, but one day, one day, I will have my revenge! (even if I have to start an anti-fashion blog to do it! - I wonder if daddy-hatee is taken?)

-You Know Who

Noël said...

Haha my mother has this book! She keeps it in her cookbook section for those special times when guests skim over her recipes.

Catherine said...

And I imagine you looking like this when you "bwahahaahahaha"
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=44025917&ref=cat2_gallery_1

Kyle said...

Hahaha. "Send book to Arch Nemesis's house with a note that says, "You might want to look up the antidote on page 43. Like, now."" Send that to one of my many nemesises...
I need this book... seeing as how I'm currently poisoning the First World's water supply. (Just in case I accidently poison myself or my minion...)

Chocolate said...

Aww, Winona, I think only you could make evil look so fun! Now I'm imagining you doing a Plankton-esque made cackle with scheming hand-rubbing. :D

Nadia said...

Arch-nemeses are always fun to have.


If you need help with the menacing cackle, you should definitely check out Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (A movie. The key part is here in the first minute or so: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apEZpYnN_1g)

For the poisoning thing, you must be sure to review the appropriate scene on The Princess Bride:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUee1WvtQZU

"Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is "never get involved in a land war in Asia" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line"! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha... (falls down dead)"

LOL. :)

Heidi Rose said...

LOL.

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