Thursday, May 29, 2008

The Daddy Likey Straight Talk Express: Yes, I Love My Swimsuit That Much

I raved about my new Esther Williams swimsuit back when Daddy Likey was but a zygote floating in the womb of the blogosphere (note to self: quality of metaphors decreases sharply after 2 a.m.), and in the years since, I've heard from many readers who bought their own Esthers and loved them, a few who didn't, and a great many with general questions (mostly, "Jesus, do you really love your swimsuit that much?").

In the past month alone, I've gotten no less than ten inquiries about my swimsuit. This, combined with the ominous cloud of the approaching swimsuit season, is why I've decided to set the record straight with a rapid fire Esther Williams Swimwear FAQ:

Are Esther Williams swimsuits
really as awesome as you say they are?

If Esther Williams swimsuits were handed out as free gifts to every person in New York, would it have the same effect as blaring (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher from the Statue of Liberty in the climactic scene of Ghostbusters II?

Who is Esther Williams, anyway? Is it Madonna?
No, no, silly. Esther was a swimmer/movie star (best combination ever) in the 1950's, and now she designs adorable retro swimsuits that are flattering and comfortable. She is a hero and a patriot.

Seriously though, a swimsuit that's retro and flattering and comfortable? No way. Shut up.
Yes way!

So, Esther Williams suits are custom made to order. How does this work? Is it easier than ordering a sandwich at Subway? Cuz that's sort of involved and annoying.

Don't worry--it's way easier than ordering your five dollar footlong. Here's what you do:

1. Go to Esther's website.
2. Don't let the 80's-tastic photos faze you.

3. Pick out the style of swimsuit you fancy.

4. Pick out the fabric you fancy (so many cute options--I want them all).

5. Place your order.

6. In two weeks, receive your suit and look amazingly retro glamorous.
7. Begin spreading the gospel.

Since these swimsuits are custom made, they must cost, like, $500, right?

That's where you're wrong, friendo. All suits are around 80 bucks, which is way less than most designer suits churned out in third world factories, and way worth it.

Are there plus size options?

Yep. They carry sizes 6-26.

Soft foam cups sound good, but that "3/4 inch elastic under bust for support" bit makes me nervous. Will I feel saggy and naked in this thing?
As a chesty girl, I can measure my life in the number of swimsuit bust support systems that have let me down (quite literally) in frustrating and horrifying ways, so I was also nervous about the soft foam cups. I was pleasantly surprised by the suit's support--I think it's all about the quality of the fabric and getting a good fit. I wouldn't jog in it (I also wouldn't really jog, period), but I definitely don't feel saggy and naked in it. Praise the lord!

I hate buying a new swimsuit every damn year. How do Esther Williams swimsuits hold up?

Well, I got mine in September of '06, and it's still going strong. Here is a list of some of the things my swimsuit has been through:
  • Daily lounging and lap swimming in a chlorinated pool during my five month stay in Hawaii.
  • Snorkeling and swimming in the ocean in Hawaii.
  • Halfheartedly splashing around in the ocean before screaming, "Holy shit it's cold!" and running away from the ocean in Oregon.
  • Pretending I know how to boogie board.
  • Teaching a man who may have been Danny DeVito to pretend how to boogie board.
What does your swimsuit look like in real life?
Before you look (you already looked, didn't you?), I want you to know that I got to snap one photo before my stupid camera died, so this picture really doesn't do it justice:

But if it still looks cute tossed hastily onto my living room floor, think how cute it looks on a person, poolside, with a pair of Jackie O shades and self-esteem to boot! Bonus: the halter strap can be tied around the back for a cute strapless look and no tanlines.

This style is the 1 Piece Classic Sheath and the fabric is called...wait for it....wait for it...Polka Dot (White on Black).

Is Esther Williams paying you?
She's not, I swear! I just really love my swimsuit and want to share
the Good News.

Updated to add:
Today I received an email from wonderful reader Stephanie, who recently bought an Esther of her own: "In the spirit of sharing, I attached a bad picture of my swimsuit tossed hastily onto my bedroom floor."

Love it.


Teresa said...

I might have to get me one of these...

selinaoolala said...

omg i've been looking for a suit with high high waisted bottoms for ages! and made in your size? amazing! only one question, my shoulders are very wide, especially if i'm wearing something tight or nothing around my waist, does the halter neck emphasise this?

Sucker For Marketing said...

I think you just changed my life! I can not wait to order one. I just spent a few minutes looking at the site and will be browsing more when there's more time!

Thanks for the Swimsuit Good News!

cate said...

are they true to size, nona? i don't think i can bear hauling out a measuring tape right now.

daddylikeyblog said...

I have broad shoulders too, and I think it actually de-emphasizes them, which is so weird because the conventional halter top wisdom is that they can make anyone look like a linebacker. In my experience/opinion, though, the lines of the halter draws the eye up toward the neck and face.

Hahaha see? That's how it goes: Esther Williams changes my life, I change yours, and so on!

Oh god, I can never bear to haul out the measuring tape. I would say yes, they do run true to size, but if you hover between two sizes, order the smaller one. But don't quote me on that, even though I just declared it publicly on the internet. Another good thing about E.W. is that even though they suits are custom made, they're returnable.

Kelly said...

That is freaking adorable. Damn me and my wonky body that won't fit in conventional swimsuit sizes!!!

WendyB said...

I think you sold your soul to Esther Williams. Don't deny it.

snailmeister said...

1) Soft foam cups sound good, but that "3/4" elastic under bust for support" bit makes me nervous. Will I feel saggy and naked in this thing?

2) Hi! I've been admiring your blog for the past year. Wanted to say 'hi'. Done!

3) I desperately want your Joan of Arctic boots even though I live in NEW MEXICO. This is but one example of how your writing alters my tastes and warps my thinking. Thank you.

Lia said...

Oh, I am definately going to be purchasing one of these! I've been looking at them for weeks, and since reading your blog posts, I realize I need one :)

I do want to know the answer to snailmeister's 1st question though, that is one thing that I am worried about... my current swimsuit has a similar built in bra and it is kinda uncomfortable...

Christine said...

I have the same concern as there enough support in these bating suits?

Lady Smaggle said...

Oh my god! I bought the same one in red polka dots from Baby Jo Vintage! I LOVE LOVE LOVE them! I have only worn them once because we had a a really lame summer in Australia this year but they are gorgeous and totally flatten my own 'rotund gut'. Highly recommended from me as well!

Bekah said...

I haven't been on my computer since...sunday? monday? (I know, I almost died) and I haven't been able to check and I'm so so so relieved now that I'm reading the good ol dl.
I may have to buy one of these one time, I LOVE those kinds of suits...if only half the teenagers on the beach had the same ideal that one pieces can be extremely sexy. yours is soo adorable, and I'm glad that it's lasted, that one of my pet peeves. and woo woo swimmers!

Kirsten said...

Dude. Seriously. I have one and I am no longer afraid to go out into public in a swimsuit. Not even the "small wading pool in the back yard for my three year old" public, but REAL honest to god STRANGER public. These suits are the real deal. I lost weight and I am paying money to have mine altered because I LIKE IT THAT MUCH. OMG. Go buy four right now.

amanda said...

I want one so bad but I have one reservation: I have MAJOR hips, and I'm a bit worried that the cut will make them look even bigger. Are my fears justified, or am I being overly paranoid?

BlossomClothing said...

ooh those swimsuits looks delicious
how fun!
your blog is sweet
fancy swapping links?
love from blossomclothingx

ms. spinach said...

oh maw god oh maw god oh maw god! hurrah!

looks like i picked the wrong week to give up credit cards...

enc said...

That's a pretty great swimsuit.

Queen S said...

oh my god those swimsuits are so cute! im a big fan of 40s/50s fashion. As soon as i return to the US I'm ordering myself one of those!

pretty face said...

Was Miranda wearing a red one in SATC the movie?!?

Winnie said...

Wow, the polka dot one is fab, those are gorgeous swimsuits!

Anonymous said...

sizes 6-26? let down!! i almost wish i was a size 6 + now just so i could wear one of these swimsuits. i was seriously contemplating gaining more weight just now, but then i remembered that i would no longer be able to fit into my current wardrobe.

Jackie said...

I also echo the support question, as I am rather chesty.

I first discovered your blog about a month ago thanks to my Google Reader recommendations page, and I have to say I love it! Like, a lot. I think the first post I read was the one aout how higher waisted jeans can make a good girdle, and I was hooked. So much so that I went back and read all of your archived entries...i may have a problem. :)

Thank you for writing such a kick-ass blog!

la petite fashionista said...

this bathing suit is absolutely amazing. I bet its super flattering and i love the retro style. I wish I had a poool to lounge by in this gorgeous piece of bathing suit!


whatwewantisfree said...

I totally want one but i hate foam cups! even in tshirt bras. i am now reticent about ordering one. also: i surf, does the swim suit um stay on/up in oceanic waves?

Beka said...

You are a genius! This is exactly what I was looking for! Thanks, love.

Ruby Fuerza AKA Lucille Brawl said...

I am a HUGE fan of Esther William swimsuits!! I bought the classic high-waist two piece in dark brown last year. I was so excited when it arrive because it is more or less the first bikini I have worn in my life - highly recommended!

One note - I ordered it one size bigger because bathing suits tend to run small. No need to do so with E.W. They fit true to size, if not slightly bigger

ALSO, last year when I was searching for a website that could express ship my suit, I came across a Christian themed website purveying 'modest swimwear'that sold E.W. but ---------> is the best!

Gemma said...

Winona, how could you do this to me? Yesterday I told my friend that for the whole of June I was on a 'no shopping' diet in order to save cash. Now you find my dream bikini and rave about the service?

I'm consoling myself that the shipping to the UK makes this 'quite expensive' as opposed to 'quite reasonable'. Also, no vacation until next I will have to wait.

Joanna Goddard said...

i LOVE the ones you chose. i'm going over the right now!

Andrea said...

Thank you for posting this! You are my new hero. I just ordered the same one, in black.

Marie said...

I love my Esther Williams suit! I bought the red one with white polka dots and I adore it! So glad the vintage suit trend is in this summer.

kitty kate said...

my great grandma's name was esther williams.....i don't know the famous one, will google it later.

nice blog!!!!!

westrum said...

Alas! My Esther Williams suit has arrived, and we were not meant for each other; because the front is twice as thick as the back, the front and back appear to be different colors.
Am I the only one who feels like the back is almost totally transparent?
Also, the suit squashed my breasts and gave me My First Ever Saddlebags. But DANG, does it look cute on my living room floor....

ML said...

Sigh. Your living room carpets remind me of those in my Grandma's house in Troy, Michigan - so fluffy and beige.

(The swimsuits look pretty damn good too)

srk said...

It is, however, incredibly easier to project yourself as the sexiest at the beach by putting on sexy bikinis available for sale at This statement holds true for the sole reason that as soon as you make your choice from the whole array of swim wears offered by us, they would perfectly complement your body, thereby making your figure attractive to the young and old alike. So, buy swim suit from us immediately and enjoy your day at the beach.

Dan said...

Hmm, maybe i'll show the wife this..or i'll try to win one here lol

Dan said...

Hmm, maybe i'll show the wife this..or i'll try to win one here lol Swimsuit Contest

ed said...


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