Don't Show-cha Your Chocha, Volume XIII

Ah, nothing brightens up a tough week like a long overdue edition of Don't Show-cha Your Chocha! (Well, 60 affirming comments from my amazing readers helps too--thanks again!)

So let's get right to it, shall we? (Amazing new readers can click here for the storied origins of DSYC.)

First off, Elena sums up this picture with a sentence that may become this feature's new slogan:

Either this girl is missing some necessary female anatomy or it's just simply scandalous.

Reader Rachel spotted this lil' (literally) number while browsing the Betsey Johnson website:

She says: There is NO WAY anyone could wear that thing as a dress without something underneath. The model is doing a lovely crossed-leg pose, of course. I'm actually a little disappointed in Betsey Johnson for this- I feel like her dresses are normally just the right kind of short.

From Kat, an extremely chic yet still chocharific outfit:

I found this quite amusing...the model obviously doesn't though.

Princess Poochie came across some classy high fashion chocha from the Sartorialist:

At least homegirl is ownin' it.

This model, on the other hand, is not ownin' it:

As Claudia points out: Lucky for the model, she didn't have to show her face!

Danger, Gossip Girl! Danger!

Says Nicole: Stuffing her hand in that abnormally huge pocket to give some coverage. Nice move, Leighton.

The brave Abbey takes on Aggy for this egregious Chocha offense:

What is there to say? That is quite obviously a shirt, and her seemingly jaunty pose is cleverly designed to prevent inevitable chocha exposure. I know everyone thinks Agyness Deyn can do no wrong, but seriously, she needs to wear something that provides more adequate coverage of the lady bits.

Josefina calls this a "Whoops! Too late!" edition:

Yeeeepp, I'd have to agree there.

Sophie says: Here are some DSYC sightings from, you guessed it, ShopBop:

Nice subtle-hem-pull-down, girlfriend! Almost had us fooled that you're feeling comfortable and covered. Almost. Actually, not at all.

And finally, Gwyneth Paltrow seems to have been a bit confused during the Iron Man promotional circuit and thought she was promoting a different film called Exposed Woman, because sweet jesus did her chocha get a lot of air (and I don't mean airtime, I mean actual air) these past couple months. I got quite a few emails on the topic, so I'm going to post the photos and the fantastic reader comments in one cluster for maximum enjoyment:

Here she is a a premiere, in a fantastic dress that is actually a fairly short shirt:

Jayca: Oh boy. Or should I say, "Damn, girl!" I found this on Perez Hilton (I'm so sorry, brain cells), and had to alert the DSYC police. One almost wants leggings - even on the gracious on Ms. Paltrow - at this point. Actually, this may not even qualify in the "Don't" part of this feature (I'm so sorry, eyeballs).

Meghan: GWYNETH WHY WHY WHY?

Tara: You can actually see the curve of her ass check through the angle of the dress. This epidemic really needs to be stopped.

Next she did a spread in Harper's Bazaar where she forgot a lot of the components of an outfit:

(The text reads: "I don't want to look like a mother who doesn't care.")

Sara: I don't want to look like a mom who doesn't care that she is showing her baby maker!

Paula: If she rotated six inches this would be a whole different kind of magazine.

Eritia: Gwenyth Paltrow on July's Harper's Bazaar cover would definitely be pulled over by my hawkeye vice principal and made to change into gym shorts if she attended my high school. To quote my history teacher: "If I can see butt cheek, then it's time for some longer skirts ladies."

Amen, Eritia's history teacher, amen.

At the risk of sounding uncouth, there's a lot more chocha where that came from, so expect another volume of these risque gems fairly soon. And keep sending me your finds--they're getting better and better! daddylikeyblog@gmail.com