It's been a long while indeed, but the men are back in action, baby. If you're new to the blog, you might want to catch up on the FMFFI phenom by reading the intro here, or clicking on the FMFFI label below to read the whole archive of confused men vs. high fashion.
In case you're too lazy to click on links, and because I'm an enabler, allow me to explain: Five Men's Fashion First Impressions is a popular feature here at Daddy Likey, in which I ask my boyfriend, dad, and brothers for their opinions on a slightly puzzling (often, really puzzling) piece of high fashion, and publish the first things that come out of their mouths (or, in the case of my dad today, the first many things, plus a photo).
Today's fashion item is this incredibly, er, substantial bracelet from Matthew Williamson's runway show:
I must confess that I lifted this photo from one of Queen Michelle's posts, but I figured that since she's a fan of FMFFI, she wouldn't mind (hopefully, she'll spare my head). You might also recognize the bracelet from Mischa Barton's unfortunate British Elle cover, hilariously dissed here by The Fug Girls.
I happen to think this bracelet is beyond cool (yes, seriously), but let's see what the men make of it, shall we?
Brother, Age 12: Hmmm...it looks like a basketball with a hole through it covered in beads and snakeskin and candy wrappers. Or is it a disco ball?
Brother, Age 17: That's a real thing? (Thoughtful pause) Did someone already say, 'Jupiter?'
Brother, Age 17: Jupiter. Or any gas planet, I guess.
Father: (Long silence) It looks like a bracelet with Elephantiasis.
Me: What the hell is Elephantiasis?
Father: It's a filarial disease. It makes your extremities swell up, among other things...(Another long silence as he stares at the photo)...That's a man's hand.
Me: No it's not.
Father: Yes it is.
Me: No, I have a full photo of the woman walking down the runway.
Father: Oh yeah? Well, she has man hands.
(Another long silence as he stares at the photo, then opens desk drawer to retrieve his extremely chic magnifying glasses, shown below*)
After studying the photo intently under magnification, he proclaims, "That's a man's hand. I'd bet money on it; that is a MAN's hand."
Boyfriend: (Eyes widen in surprise) Your dad was right. Those do look like man hands.
Brother, Age 20: I want to know what kind of man wears a complete purple silk jumpsuit.
Me: Do you think those are a man's hands too?
Brother, Age 20: They are.
So, I did a little digging on Style.com and found that the apparently man-handed model is Hilary Rhoda. Hilary, I apologize. Maybe we could do lunch and put this whole gender-questioning thing behind us, eh?
*Concerning this photo, my dad says, "This is me smiling," and my mom says, "Back off, ladies, he's mine."