SIX Men's Fashion First Impressions: Why does the bag have a crotch?

Nope, that's not a capitalized three-letter typo that happens to make sense in context, you read it right: today is a landmark day in Daddy Likey history. Today (well, actually last Friday, but I was too busy to post until now), I decided to shake things up and keep the Five Men on their divalicious toes by inviting a guest Man to share his first impression of a fashion item. (Click here if you're a new reader and want an explanation of this confusing "Five Men" business.)


The natural choice for the first ever Sixth Man (disregarding Kadeem Hardison's masterful performance, forgive me) was Mr. Thomas Wong from The Sunday Best, a longtime fan of FMFFI and style maven (manven?) extraordinaire.

For today's special installment of SMFFI, I decided to show the men something a little more subtle than, say, this, something fairly mainstream with fairly strange details, something that could make an articulate and stylish blogger exclaim, "It looks like it has boobs!" Something like this:

Alexander Wang Zipper Hobo (Click to see it bigger), $796, shopbop.com

And now, the men:

Father: It looks kind of scrotal with zippers. There is nothing about it that makes me happy.

Boyfriend: I'm just really confused by it. Does it come apart in the middle so you can make two bags?
Me: Like an amoeba?
Boyfriend: Yeah! Cool.

Brother, age 21: It looks like an ass.

Brother, age 18: Obviously stolen from the set of an early eighties German porno.

Bob: A robot's butt? I don't know. It doesn't look all that strange really. Too many zippers. It seems like if you opened that zipper in the middle all of your stuff would fall out.

Aaaaannnnnnddd last but not least:

The Sixth Man: It looks like short pants for German midget fetish play. Wait, it's a bag. Why is there a zipper in the bag's crotch? Why does the bag have a crotch?

Not bad, Thomas, not bad at all.

As always, if you'd like to hear the men's opinions on a particular fashion item, send me an email. And if you'd like to nominate yourself or an opinionated man in your life to be the Sixth Man sometime in the future, write me a short poem around the theme: "Men and Fashion" and I'll consider it.