Thursday, September 24, 2009

Five Men's Fashion First Impressions!

It's time once again for the ever-popular Five Men's Fashion First Impressions, in which I ask the five most prominent men in my life (sorry Matthew Gray Gubler, you're number 6) for their honest first impressions of a unique piece of clothing or accessory.

Today's subject comes from the blog of the inimitable Sara Zucker, esquire:

To answer all immediate questions: it's a scarf full of holes, it costs $150, I think it's sort of amazing, and Sara used it as inspiration for a badass DIY project.

Here's what the men had to say:

Brother, age 14: (Lifts eyebrow, backs away from computer) Is it like, umm, a hippie sponge? It's made of hemp, isn't it?
Me: What do you actually think it is?
Brother, age 14: Ummm...a carpet?

Brother, age 21: It looks like something they found on the floor in a leather tannery.

Boyfriend: What is it?
Me: A scarf.
Boyfriend: Are you sure it's not a sea sponge?

Brother, age 19: Burlap wasp nest...a Mesopotamian relic.

Father: (Laughs) Oh, Jesus Christ. Well, what is it?
Me: It's a scarf.
Father: What's it made of?
Me: Cotton jersey.
Father: One time I was helping Washington County Sheriff's Office search for a body, and we took apart a woodpile at a suspect's house, and we found something that looked almost exactly like that.
Me: Was it a body?
Father: No, but it smelled awful and looked like bug-eaten human flesh.
Me: Wow.


kadler said...

I have to admit, I wasn't exactly sure what it was at first either. I was hoping for "tube top full of holes." But a scarf is close enough.

[null] said...

Bug-eaten human flesh. Niiiiiice.

Siru said...

The teacher might think I'm od as I'm laughing out loud here. ButI can't help myself :D.

juliet xxx

Tara said...

:O No one puts The Gube at number six!

...but, I doubt he would be able to make such hilarious observations as the five men.

Heidi Rose said...

I admit, I probably wouldn't have know what it is, seeing only part of it like this.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. Your dad and my dad should have a Gross Out Contest sometime.

Vanessa said...

I hope no one who has trypophobia (fear of holes) finds this, because for some reason it's kinda creeping ME out, and I don't even have a phobia. Like, seriously, it reminds me of one of those nasty pipa toads, but for your neck. Ewwww.

Erin said...

i love how your dad always has a little anecdote

Alpha Monkey said...

The color is partly to blame. I have seen dead farm animals in the Mississippi River after spring floods. This most resembles the pig variety. And the human hand nibbled by fish I once ran over with a boat. Don't worry, the rest of the human was not with it.

Also, the presentation lends itself to the general sense of bloated tissue.

In one word: cadaverous.

Word Verification: MINGLONK: the ability to choke someone with your mind, first used by Ming The Merciless but perfected by Lord Vader.

Anonymous said...

Haha I love your dad's answer!
To be doesn't look like a scarf on that photo, but I'd imagine it'd be pretty awesome in real life.

FutureLint said...

Hmm, I kinda have to agree with the guys based on the picture... but once it is unfurled and perhaps in a peppier color, I could see myself wearing it!

Unknown said...

Ahhh! I love that you love Matthew Gray Gubler too! He is the reason I watch Criminal Minds, with all that skinny vaguely greasy cardigan-wearing nerdiness! Also, FMFFI is awesome as usual. I think you should have not told us what it was and let us guess, because I would not have guessed scarf. Not in a million years.

Helen said...

your dad is brilliant

Anonymous said...

Ohhahahaha! I have to admit, I'm right there with your top 5 men. I would have never guessed a scarf. Very entertaining post! <3

Lymie said...

Your dad has the best little storys/answers.

Me said...

i love bob..."its made of hemp, isnt it?" lol!

Katie said...

hahaha this post is awesome

Gem said...

Hahaha, wow, your dad should be the PR guy for the scarf creator!

Leila said...

Def didn't realize it was a scarf... but figured it was uber trendy.

Lisa said...

Haha I always look forward to your dad's reactions in FMFFI posts--the references are so random.

Thanks for the birthday wishes!

Bella said...

haha this is so funny. but did you realise there is a blog called "daddy like" i made the mistake of clicking on it :/ one word: perverted xx

sara said...


Applesaucery said...

I just wanted you to know that this scarf looks EXACTLY like my blankie when I was little, which I kept for an ass-long time and refused to either wash or throw away, 'til gradually the fabric split apart and formed holes and fringe just like this.
Maybe it's meant to be a pre-worn-in comfort object?

hannah said...

Matthew Grey Gubler! <3 I'm glad I'm not the only one!

Amanda M. said...

Sixth man; my boyfriend, Brandon.

Brandon: It's a sponge.
Me:.... Anything else?
Brandon: It kind of looks like it's fashioned from tree bark or... dead skin.
Me: ...
Brandon: That is all.
Me: Do you want to know what it is?
Brandon: It's a scarf full of holes. It costs $150.
Me: You weren't supposed to read the webpage.

daddylikeyblog said...

Amanda--I am laughing SO hard right now. And I totally needed a good laugh, so thank you. :)

mens jewellery said...

This scarf is really cool i guess, my mom's built one for me but it was so wooly wooly.

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