I would say approximately 83% of my vocabulary is comprised of irony creepers: once upon a time, the phrases "mad scrilla" and "totes magotes" and "shmello" were silly things I said in silly voices, but now I say them often and unironically--yes, I very earnestly talk like a douchebag.
So anyway, this got me thinking: there are irony creepers in my wardrobe too, things that I first wore as a joke or as part of a costume, that are now on heavy rotation in the front of my closet. Here are five examples that immediately come to mind:
1. Furry trapper hats
I definitely bought my first trapper cap as a sort of "LOL what is she wearing on her head?" experiment, but then I fell in love with it. Now I own four.
This lady knows what's up.3. Aviator sunglasses the size of dinner plates
In high school, my friend Carolyn and I delighted in a tradition we called "hoedowns," which basically meant that we went to Goodwill, chose the most awful, horrifying, ridiculous outfits for each other, and then wore them out in public. I once dressed Carolyn in a legendary jumpsuit made of floral burlap, and on one of these occasions an accessory to my lime-green polyester tube dress was a pair of huge aviators we found in the $1 bin. We laughed about how silly they were and took pictures and then I started wearing them everyday. And seven years later, I still do. They're even featured in my Twitter profile pic.
4. Sorel Snowboots
I asked for these boots for Christmas a couple years ago specifically because I thought they were ugly and utilatarian. But I also think they are totally awesome, and tend to wear them everyday when it gets cold. A couple weeks ago I wore them on a walk around a trendy part of Portland, and I was getting hit on so incessently that my friend asked, "Are you in heat?" I said, "No, I swear it's the boots!" I think their profound ugliness was attracting hipster boys like a moth to an ironic flame.5. A large and varied collection of awful sweaters, featuring embroidered Santa Cats and random Korean phone numbers.
Do you guys have any irony creepers in your wardrobe? What about your vocabulary?
p.s. Big giveaway tomorrow! Come back soon, ya hear?
39 comments:
Not sure if I have any irony creepers in my wardrobe, but I started using "OMG" in a pretentiously derogatory manner and now I use it in earnest. OMG. What has happened to me?
Being from Wisconsin, trapper hats are essential. I just moved back from California, own none. This winter is going to kill me.
i'm boring- i seriously think my biggest "irony creeper: wardrobe edition" is leggings. yup, black leggings. whereas i used to think they were terrible, i now have them in every length and wear the crap out of them.
Back in high school, I bought a pair of bright green shoes that I thought (at the time) were totally crazy. But now, most of my shoes are bright, random colors and are best worn when they match nothing else in my outfit. Not as cool as yours; I need to take my wardrobe less seriously!
This makes me thankful I resisted my impulse to buy a Hannah Montana t-shirt and wear it ironically. Obviously I have a secret love for Hannah Montana that I haven't admitted to myself. Maybe I should just go with it, though.... her songs ARE catchy!
I say totes magotes all. the. time.
This summed me up perfectly.
I'm Asian, so a few years back I started flashing the two-fingered peace sign in all my photos as an ironic joke to the many, many Asian tourists that strike these poses in all their photos.
Now, it's become an instinctual habit. I can't hold my fingers down! IRONY CREEPER!
I live in the interior of Alaska and those Sorels are admittedly the more fashionable choice. I actually don the bunny boot, the extra warm white ones. they are my "Alaskan high heels".
I'm pretty sure most of my wardrobe is things I buy out of irony. A hoodie the color of yellow hi-liters? Apple green skinny jeans? Knee-hi shiny silver Doc Martin's? Oh yeah. I have this talent of going into stores, finding the ugliest thing in there, saying "WOW, this is absolutely hideous" and making it work in my wardrobe. Pure awesomeness.
saaaaame here on the trapper hat and silly sweaters and glasses that eat up your face. i think i thrive on irony creepers. my contributions to the list: unnecessarily flashy "bling-bling" gold necklace. ass-baring shorts. big plastic eyeglasses.
Oh my goodness, TOTALLY! All my giant old lady sunglasses started out ironic, my giant oversized Mickey Mouse sweater, my pink swans sweater, well, practically my whole wardrobe my or may not be kidding...
The worst one in my vocabulary is the result of spending too much time with one of my gay boyfriends. Whenever I want to dismiss something as silly or tell someone I disagree with them, or really anything... it's "Go home, Roger!" Yes, that's right, I now run around sounding like Tia and Tamara.
I hang my head in shame.
How about UGGS? I thought it was short for uuggly and why would people wear furry moon boots that aren't even water proof? Now I wear them like flip flops, everyday, dragging them along.
A friend of mine went to law school in the OC and started saying hip things like "whatevs." During a weekend with her several of us said it in jest, pretty much as often as possible. Unfortunately, one weekend was all I needed and it is now a regular part of my vocab.
I bought my first (adult) Christmas sweater (for an ugly sweater party) and can easily see it going into my teacher wardrobe int he future. The beaded tassle zipper pull is just far too awesome.
I have a big, square, polyester scarf adorned with a glorious unicorn. I bought it for the hilarity; I wear it because I have no shame.
O Nona! This is so great.
Now that you've said it I can totes (<--) recognise the irony creep in my life.
It's like when you tell yourself something enough you actually start to believe it!
You are like some kind of fashion demi-god...also, it occurs to me that you have created possibly the most awesomely ironic ensemble ever in this post, and since I am still patiently awaiting photographic proof of the Santa cat sweater, (and really, haven't I been patient?) I propose a photo wearing all these items at once.
It will be EPIC I believe.
This post made an awesome and amusing read. Really put a lift on my sad, sniffle-y day. Furry Tracker Caps are also a love of mine... though it might be too late to add them to my Christmas list. I'm relatively certain "Santa" thinks their ugly and wouldn't want me wearing one anyway... ah well! We are doomed to want what we can't have!
Hmn..I can't think of any irony creepers of my own.
Love this post!
Though--to crib shamelessly from Wilde--I feel the need to say, "To buy one trapper hat, Ms Likey, may be regarded as an exploration; to buy four seems like recklessness."
Irony creepers (verbal) = "That's how I roll."
Irony creepers (unvoiced) = "I'll cut you, bitch."
Irony creeper (closet) = None.
[Hmmmm, maybe that's my wardrobe's problem.]
MY OLD LADY PURSE!
oh. my. god.
so, I was at the antique mall, and I saw this fantastic, gigantic, ugly-as-fuck carpet bag. It has black leather handles that juuust barely fit over my shoulder if i don't have my coat on, it's square, and RIGID. it has a gigantic gold zipper, and it is - as i said - a carpet bag. it's made from a nasty faded old floral print fabric and i LOVE it.
it's less of an irony creeper and more of an intentional irony piece. i bought it to wear ironically. i love the juxtaposition of it next to a tiny, adorable outfit. why tiny and adorable? because it's huge and ugly! LOVE!
aviators, bandanas, flannel, and saying "fo sho" and "jk"
oh my gosh, I have so many irony creepers in my vocabulary. I don't know about wardrobe, but I started saying "hella" and "tight" and a bunch of other things ironically and now they're totally part of my normal vocab.
There are too many to count!
juliet xxx
The colloquial words I use in my every day language are entirely stolen from my best friend, who starts saying things to annoy me, then we use them ironically, and now "Oh hai -name something that's happening or has appeared or just been noticed-" "girl" and "boyf" (instead of girlfriend and boyfriend) and "burb" (instead of "BRB") make my English professor mother start bleeding from her ears. Plaid, huge ugly socks, giant Christmas or Grandpa sweaters, trapper hats, cowboy boots, I'm sure there's more. Whatevs, I probs look hella adorbz anyways, and you should totes never take yourself too seriously.
I have resisted so far, but those ugh boot knock offs that are everywhere now, keep catching my eye. They are so not me but I fear I will own a pair in the next couple of months :(
This is so true! My friend and I call each other seester. But when you're texting, T9 comes up peerver. And now we say peerver like it is a real word. And that is just one weird example.
Wait, what, trapper hats aren´t hot?
I used to own one that was bright teal, with a picture of geese flying over mountains on in. Still mourn its loss!
Well, ya stole mine. My giant furry trapper hat was bought for sheer absurdity ... but I've found that it is FANTASTIC in subzero temps!
pink crocs! I love them!
Does my Patrick Kelly leopard print dress count as an irony creeper? I definitely have dresses that I got because they're crazy, then I get used to them, then I just wear them and am surprised when people react to them.
HAHAHA I definitely have these in my vocab. Less in my wardrobe - just because I know myself well enough to know that if I let them into my house, I WILL be the girl in zebra print leggings and a trapper hat and duck boots all at once and loving it.
I got my boyfriend this t-shirt:
http://www.threadless.com/product/1960/Three_Keyboard_Cat_Moon
which is titled "three keyboard cat moon." It was a joke, but he now wears it almost every single day.
ps. I know it's weird for me to ask you a favor because I don't know you at all, but will you PLEASE make a gift guide for the holidays? Maybe one for guys and one for the ladies? I've been hoping you'd do one so I figured I'd ask!
wwaayy too many irony creepers in my vocab: sick, sweet, totes, jell (jealous), probs, obvi, mad (as an adverb), most def, ballin/baller, lame the list goes on...I think being a lazy university student has changed my vocabulary for the worst
as for wardrobe, I think I have a few things (probably mostly from american apparel, like a spandex unitard), but I can't think of all of them at the moment
totes jellin over your fur trapper hat though.
I used to mock those cheesy iron-on tee shirts that you get at the beach/county fair/wherever. Then two summers ago, I went up to Old Orchard Beach in Maine with my husband and our nephew...and we had them made at the tee shirt shop. My nephew got one depicting a herd of wild horses galloping majestically through the mist, and I got a pouncing tiger. My husband opted out because he is "too cool for that". Too bad, he doesn't know what he's missing. I wear my tiger tee shirt all the time.
That Three Keyboard Cat Moon shirt is fantastic!
As for my irony creeper, it's not that interesting but I'll tell it anyway: when I was younger I had a weight problem (AKA - too much of it). I liked to wear leggings and bike shorts because they were stretchy and comfy, but the other kids were cruel and made fun of me. I vowed never to wear leggings again.
Lo and behold, I bought a pair when I turned 24 to keep me warm under OTHER pants. Then I realized I could use them to keep warm in the winter while wearing skirts and dresses and even shorts. Now it's this huge full-blown trend and I bought myself six different colors of leggings for Christmas.
Last Halloween I bought this massive, green plaid, classically ugly Laura Ashley jumper from a thrift store for my creepy librarian costume.
Then a few days ago I saw it hanging in my closet and was like, hey that's actually kinda nice. So I shortened it, threw on some classy tights and wore it unironically to a Christmas party. It was actually a huge hit!
i can't think of any wardrobe irony creepers, but my vocab is 90% of them. i started saying beastly to make fun of all the people who say beastly... and now i use it like six times a day :D this post is so amazingly awesomely lame-tastic it warms my heart.
I have a tee-shirt in the I heart NY style that says I heart booty and the heart is upside down like...a booty. It makes me laugh everytime! And a fake fur parka. And a fake fur and leather pimp coat....oh dear
word-wise - "boma" is my poison (scottish chav speak-best of mates always), also "dude" has crept in there and "maaan!" as an exclamation
I now say Oh My Lord in every other sentence and I swear I once used to think that was a silly Ned Flanders sort of thing to say. I love that USA University sweater and am so happy you bought it! S.
Oh, so many verbal irony creepers. My sister says silly things like "whatev" that annoy me, but I find them creeping into my vocabulary. Argh.
Additionally, I teach middle school, so their ridiculous sayings penetrate my everyday vocabulary, which makes me a little sad.
- OMG (really exaggerate each letter, really country, and kind of sing-songy, and that will be about right.)
- That's how I roll. (Specifically when a teenager tries to ask me why I do the things I do ... or why they are getting punished.)
Quote from Sweet Home Alabama:
- Why do you make me be mean to you? (See above explanation. I started saying it to be funny, but I began to realize that it fit perfectly.)
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